Post by Sarah Hrejsa on Mar 24, 2010 20:29:45 GMT -5
Okay, so I thought I'd take the time to express why I did what I did to you, Nathan. This is NOT an apology to you or to any of the people who are so utterly shocked that anyone could backstab another person so badly in a game. OH MY what is the world coming to when someone has the audacity to play dirty in a G-A-M-E?!?!?!?! This is just my point of view in case you care to know. Those who don't please feel free to pass over this thread.
Was I a bitch this season? YES, definitely! I didn’t want to play the same game I played Season 2 and being a bitch, lying, backstabbing was all acceptable to me if I needed to do it to protect my alliance – which was Will and I at the beginning. I was going to do whatever I needed to in order to protect that alliance. Renny was added to that alliance (the F3 was her idea and Will and I both jumped all over it) but that wasn’t until later. Renny love forever btw! <333
Nathan, I did plan to work with you in the game – as I needed to. But as far as you saying how I had your loyalty above everyone but Renny, well that just wasn’t apparent to me. Round to round we talked briefly about whether the other was safe, etc, but there was nothing deeper than that. You barely talked to me and I had no idea what else was going on with you. I suspected you were with Jason and Sheila, I knew you were friends with Alex and probably loyal to him over me, I KNEW you had Renny's back 100% and she had yours over Will and I and I heard you were with Lydia and Roddy, I really wasn’t sure.
I stayed close enough to you that you wouldn’t put me up when you won HOH and I tried to give you other ideas as targets rather than Will. I jumped on the idea of you putting up Jun against Eddie and made sure you knew she was targeting you so you wouldn’t put Will up. But, I know you were nervous about Will and I think you would have put him up at F7 had you won that HOH. I could have been wrong, yes, but that is what I was going on at the time.
Going back to the powers and using you to help me get mine: When Will got the first key to Pandora’s Box and told me about it we spent that night solving the clues to get to his power. We got stuck on one puzzle and it was late. He had to get to bed but I stayed up working on it, eventually solved it, and PMd him with the final password so he could claim it the next morning.
When Renny got her key we all talked about which safe to claim. Will had Safe 3 which contained a clue for season 3 and guessed correctly that Safe 1 might have the Coup from season 1. We all worked on Renny’s safe together. Will was amazingly quick solving the cryptograms and we all worked together in solving the clues and finding the boards the passwords belonged to.
When I got my key we all started to work on it but Renny had to leave and Will and I worked on the videos. Eventually we figured out the first password, but the second contained the pictures. We worked on it for a long time but couldn’t get it. I think Renny came back by that point and we all just had to give up since it was so late. The next morning Renny figured it out but didn’t PM me that she had (she was running late to class) and so Will and I had no idea she had figured it out. We kept trying and I had the idea of asking you since I thought Renny might have already told you about the safes, anyway. I figured it was another reason you would trust me so I definitely used it in order to help ME in the game. Yes, selfish. At the time you were helping me, Will was also helping and worked on the math squares after you figured out the amazon password. Will actually solved the one which contained the password and I got in and sent the PM to Chels before I told you I had it.
At the time I asked for your help, Nathan, I did intend to keep my promise. I changed my mind when I believed Will’s neck was going to be on the line. So, yes, I broke a promise to you. I gave you my word and I lied. I don’t think that has ever happened in the history of any ORG EVER so I can certainly understand why you would block me and say you are never going to talk to me again. To be fair, you and I never had a relationship outside of ORGS so I don’t know how you blocking me really makes a difference but if it makes you feel good that’s cool. I’m not saying that to be mean at all but you make it seem like we had a close relationship and I betrayed you personally. It wasn’t personal. I like you well enough but we’re not buddies or anything. And even if a close friend of mine did that to me I might be upset but I certainly wouldn’t take a game so personally. I have been backstabbed by friends in games, actually. I guess I can just separate friendship and games, no matter how close or distant that friendship may be.
In the end, it came down to me not wanting you in the end because you were clearly a threat. That and the fact that my number one loyalty was to Will and I believed his longevity in this game was directly threatened by you. Also, Will and I decided early in the game that we could not let you get far enough that you would comp whore your way to the end – again. Final 7 was far enough for us. I made the decision to do what I did and I do not regret it. Oh, I guess I should throw Eddie in here because I believed he was my 3rd – after Renny and Will. This was before I knew about his alliance to Roddy and Lydia. I could totally see you putting up Will and Eddie if you won that HOH. I knew you weren’t putting up Renny and I also felt you wouldn’t put up Roddia.
If you ask Will he’ll tell you I told him time and time again I couldn’t use it on you. Not that it matters because, to me, changing my mind and breaking the promise is really the same as just lying about it in the first place. You can choose to not respect my game. I really don’t care. You played how you saw fit and I played how I chose. So, that’s the story behind the evilness that was Sarah this season. There are more details but I tried to be brief and cover the basics. Hope it was at least informative.
Was I a bitch this season? YES, definitely! I didn’t want to play the same game I played Season 2 and being a bitch, lying, backstabbing was all acceptable to me if I needed to do it to protect my alliance – which was Will and I at the beginning. I was going to do whatever I needed to in order to protect that alliance. Renny was added to that alliance (the F3 was her idea and Will and I both jumped all over it) but that wasn’t until later. Renny love forever btw! <333
Nathan, I did plan to work with you in the game – as I needed to. But as far as you saying how I had your loyalty above everyone but Renny, well that just wasn’t apparent to me. Round to round we talked briefly about whether the other was safe, etc, but there was nothing deeper than that. You barely talked to me and I had no idea what else was going on with you. I suspected you were with Jason and Sheila, I knew you were friends with Alex and probably loyal to him over me, I KNEW you had Renny's back 100% and she had yours over Will and I and I heard you were with Lydia and Roddy, I really wasn’t sure.
I stayed close enough to you that you wouldn’t put me up when you won HOH and I tried to give you other ideas as targets rather than Will. I jumped on the idea of you putting up Jun against Eddie and made sure you knew she was targeting you so you wouldn’t put Will up. But, I know you were nervous about Will and I think you would have put him up at F7 had you won that HOH. I could have been wrong, yes, but that is what I was going on at the time.
Going back to the powers and using you to help me get mine: When Will got the first key to Pandora’s Box and told me about it we spent that night solving the clues to get to his power. We got stuck on one puzzle and it was late. He had to get to bed but I stayed up working on it, eventually solved it, and PMd him with the final password so he could claim it the next morning.
When Renny got her key we all talked about which safe to claim. Will had Safe 3 which contained a clue for season 3 and guessed correctly that Safe 1 might have the Coup from season 1. We all worked on Renny’s safe together. Will was amazingly quick solving the cryptograms and we all worked together in solving the clues and finding the boards the passwords belonged to.
When I got my key we all started to work on it but Renny had to leave and Will and I worked on the videos. Eventually we figured out the first password, but the second contained the pictures. We worked on it for a long time but couldn’t get it. I think Renny came back by that point and we all just had to give up since it was so late. The next morning Renny figured it out but didn’t PM me that she had (she was running late to class) and so Will and I had no idea she had figured it out. We kept trying and I had the idea of asking you since I thought Renny might have already told you about the safes, anyway. I figured it was another reason you would trust me so I definitely used it in order to help ME in the game. Yes, selfish. At the time you were helping me, Will was also helping and worked on the math squares after you figured out the amazon password. Will actually solved the one which contained the password and I got in and sent the PM to Chels before I told you I had it.
At the time I asked for your help, Nathan, I did intend to keep my promise. I changed my mind when I believed Will’s neck was going to be on the line. So, yes, I broke a promise to you. I gave you my word and I lied. I don’t think that has ever happened in the history of any ORG EVER so I can certainly understand why you would block me and say you are never going to talk to me again. To be fair, you and I never had a relationship outside of ORGS so I don’t know how you blocking me really makes a difference but if it makes you feel good that’s cool. I’m not saying that to be mean at all but you make it seem like we had a close relationship and I betrayed you personally. It wasn’t personal. I like you well enough but we’re not buddies or anything. And even if a close friend of mine did that to me I might be upset but I certainly wouldn’t take a game so personally. I have been backstabbed by friends in games, actually. I guess I can just separate friendship and games, no matter how close or distant that friendship may be.
In the end, it came down to me not wanting you in the end because you were clearly a threat. That and the fact that my number one loyalty was to Will and I believed his longevity in this game was directly threatened by you. Also, Will and I decided early in the game that we could not let you get far enough that you would comp whore your way to the end – again. Final 7 was far enough for us. I made the decision to do what I did and I do not regret it. Oh, I guess I should throw Eddie in here because I believed he was my 3rd – after Renny and Will. This was before I knew about his alliance to Roddy and Lydia. I could totally see you putting up Will and Eddie if you won that HOH. I knew you weren’t putting up Renny and I also felt you wouldn’t put up Roddia.
If you ask Will he’ll tell you I told him time and time again I couldn’t use it on you. Not that it matters because, to me, changing my mind and breaking the promise is really the same as just lying about it in the first place. You can choose to not respect my game. I really don’t care. You played how you saw fit and I played how I chose. So, that’s the story behind the evilness that was Sarah this season. There are more details but I tried to be brief and cover the basics. Hope it was at least informative.